Perhaps you’ve heard that there have been several notions to change the onomatopoeia for Santa Claus’ laugh to “Ha, ha, ha!” Australian Santas, in fact, have been forbidden to use the original phrase any longer. Apparently, “Ho, ho, ho!” resembles “Hoe, hoe, hoe!” a bit too much. After all, we wouldn’t want little children to know about Santa’s raging sexual desires, would we?

Well, he does deliver the toys very late at night, and is in plenty of cities. We all know what sort of individuals come out in cities late in night.

Ooh, and have you ever wondered why Santa’s “helpers” are always much younger women dressed very sexily (and not very much)? Here’s an example of what I mean. You know the type. It’s always seemed a bit odd to me, but it’s all making sense now…

Quick! Call up Mrs. Claus! Though, she’s probably not going to like this…

Oh and by the way, I’m actually dead serious about the notions to change it to “Ha, Ha, Ha!” Look it up if you don’t believe me: news stories here and here.

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